Sometimes the act of forgiving can be even more painful than the initial infraction. It is difficult to allow ourselves to let go of the indignation, anger, rage or hurt caused by the wrong done towards us. We feel that if we forgive, we are letting the person off the hook before receiving our just due in the situation – so instead of letting go by choosing to forgive, we hold them captive in our minds until we can get justice. The problem is, justice usually doesn’t come in a manner we want it to. If the persons ask for forgiveness too soon we are upset they didn’t suffer long enough. If they wait too long we feel they have allowed us to hurt for too long. God forbid, if they never ask for forgiveness; we are then thrown into a tizzy because we didn’t have our feelings validated. Even more so if we have wish ill upon a person so they can feel what we felt, and rather than negativity come their way, they begin to experience blessings. In that case we begin to fault God for not giving us the vindication we deserve. All of these scenarios end up hurting because we refuse to see through the eyes of God in the situation. We have become obsessed with the reflection of our own pain rather than focusing on God’s guidance during these situations.
It is important that we lean on him through our pain, that we learn to see people as merely imperfect beings who are going to at some point hurt us either intentionally or unintentionally. Recognize that we are all broken on some level. Learn to be able to accept the flaws the same way we accept our own. The Bible tells us to bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you (Luke 6:28 NAS). This requires a dying to self. Letting go of ones will and grabbing hold of the will of God. His will is that no one is bound by guilt or shame related to their actions against him. To accommodate that will be brought to fruition, he gave sacrificially. Sometimes we have to sacrifice our desire for vindication and justification in a situation in order to accommodate the will of God in the life of another person. It won’t feel good giving up what we feel we deserve, but in the end, it will benefit both yourself and the person who we have sacrificed for because of the grace of God being manifested in the situation.
I could spill out a lot more scriptures, itch to try proving the point, but we all know this to be true. It really just takes relying on God to act on it when we’d rather not.
Be Strengthened. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed!
Much Love, Dawn